The cpu has 16 pcie lanes dedicated to the top 2 gpu slots. When both cards are present, it changes from x16/x0/x4 to x8/x8/x4. Both lanes use the same bandwidth section of cpu lanes.
In 40+ years I've never heard of a cpu burning out pcie lanes because it was overclocked. That's a whole different area of the die, not related to the cores. I have heard of incorrect mounting pressure causing pcie lane errors, ram errors, but never burn out.
Might want to check the vbios of that new card in depth. It's possible it's not really a Titan XP, could even be a mining card with fake vbios or Titan X etc which would prevent SLI. Just having the right shroud physically doesn't make it the right card underneath. I say in depth, even to verifying the actual die physically because it's not that hard to change the identifiers to say XP but there are physical things that cannot be changed.
The basic WHQL drivers are all the same, for all nvidia cards, they are also included in all Windows versions and get updated with Windows updates. It's the advanced files that are custom to each chipset, especially pertaining to game settings/bug fixes. So any new driver files will include SLI requirements on a chipset by chipset basis. Nvidia hasn't stopped support for SLI as such, just really hasn't developed the tech any further than where it already is, because newer games aren't including SLI ability in their coding.