Custom Card #1

Toggle sidebar Toggle sidebar
G

Guest

Guest
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

Hello,
I'm attempting to make a custom set of cards, and I would appreciate it
if you all would critique the cards for wording, rules, and balance
problems. Also, if there is a better format for typing the card up
please let me know.
Thanks.



Bgtzl (rare)

Land

Phasing

When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out. As long as Bgtzl is
in play, target land does not phase in as normal. If Bgtzl leaves play
target land phases in. If target land phases in, Bgtzl phases out.

T: Add 1 to your mana pool

2: Bgtzl does not phase out this turn. Play only at the beginning of
your Untap step.



Not sure if the "If Bgtzl leaves play target land phases in." part is
worded right for what I want. I wanted the phase in to be immediate if
Bgtzl left play.

--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

kenaustin <kenaustinw@netSPAMMENOTscape.net> writes:
> Hello,
> I'm attempting to make a custom set of cards, and I would appreciate
> it if you all would critique the cards for wording, rules, and balance
> problems. Also, if there is a better format for typing the card up
> please let me know.

The following is completely my opinion. Feel free to take or ignore my
suggestions; I won't be offended.

> Bgtzl (rare)
> Land
> Phasing
> When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out. As long as Bgtzl
> is in play, target land does not phase in as normal. If Bgtzl leaves
> play target land phases in. If target land phases in, Bgtzl phases
> out.

That's way too confusing for an average player. If you printed this
card, it would have tiny text. Having complicated cards can be fine,
if the complication add something useful to the game. Having this
phase out and the other card phase in back and forth just seems like a
lot of complication for very little gain. The only real reason to play
this card that I can see is to remove one of my opponent's lands
temporarily, and I'd think that there are better cards out there that
do that.

The idea of a land that can temporarily remove an opponent's land
might have some merit, but I'd think that there has to be a simpler
way.

As for wording, each instance of the word "target" requires a target
to be chosen. If it can't phase in as normal, I'm not sure why the
last sentence is there. And phasing it doesn't trigger comes-into-play
effects. I would word this ability as several abilities, like:

When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.

Or, to simplify things, something along the lines of this maybe:
Phasing
When Bgtzl comes into play, target land gains Phasing. (This effect
doesn't end at end of turn.)

> T: Add 1 to your mana pool

No problem with that one, although I'm not sure if it's good enough to
make me want to play this card.

> 2: Bgtzl does not phase out this turn. Play only at the beginning of
> your Untap step.

You can't play anything *during* your untap step... I suspect that you
want something like:

2: Bgtzl does not phase out next turn. Play this ability only during
an opponent's end of turn step.

Although that wording won't work so well in multiplayer. You might
want to get rid of the timing restriction completely.

--
Peter C.
"Isn't that the same thing?"
"Yes, but it's a longer word."
-- Jessi & I
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 06:37:53 -0500, pete+mtg@cooperjr.name (Peter
Cooper Jr.) wrote:

>kenaustin <kenaustinw@netSPAMMENOTscape.net> writes:

>> Bgtzl (rare)
>> Land
>> Phasing
>> When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out. As long as Bgtzl
>> is in play, target land does not phase in as normal. If Bgtzl leaves
>> play target land phases in. If target land phases in, Bgtzl phases
>> out.

>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
>As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
>When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
>When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.

I agree that this is a much simpler wording of the original card (and
has fixed the "target" problem).

>Or, to simplify things, something along the lines of this maybe:
>Phasing
>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land gains Phasing. (This effect
>doesn't end at end of turn.)

But this does not result the same effect. They should alternate being
in play, but here they are either both in play or both phased out.
Also, this effect dosn't stop when Bgtzl is destroyed or returned to
your hand.
Use Astral Slide and suddently half of the opponents lands has
phasing.

>> T: Add 1 to your mana pool
>
>No problem with that one, although I'm not sure if it's good enough to
>make me want to play this card.

Perhaps make it "1 mana of any color"?
Being that the land is either only usable every second turn or has an
anti-phasing upkeep of 2, "any color" should not be too much.

>> 2: Bgtzl does not phase out this turn. Play only at the beginning of
>> your Untap step.
>
>You can't play anything *during* your untap step... I suspect that you
>want something like:
>
>2: Bgtzl does not phase out next turn. Play this ability only during
>an opponent's end of turn step.
>
>Although that wording won't work so well in multiplayer. You might
>want to get rid of the timing restriction completely.

Yup, why have the restriction at all? Activating it at the very last
moment is, almost by definition, the best choice - why have this extra
restriction when that is how it will (should) be played anyway.
You could also ask, what harm is there in allowing this to be
activated at any time?
"2: Bgtzl does not phase out next turn." gets my vote.


Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?

--
Regards
Simon Nejmann
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

Simon Nejmann <snejmann@worldonline.REMOVETHIS.dk> wrote:
>Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?

Yes, shouldn't that be "Bgztl"?

Dave "_yes_, I get bothered by misspellings, why do you ask?" DeLaney

PS: ObClue: Tinya Wazzo.
--
\/David DeLaney posting from dbd@vic.com "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://www.vic.com/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ & Magic / I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

David DeLaney wrote:

> Simon Nejmann <snejmann@worldonline.REMOVETHIS.dk> wrote:
>>Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?
>
> Yes, shouldn't that be "Bgztl"?
>
> Dave "_yes_, I get bothered by misspellings, why do you ask?" DeLaney
>
> PS: ObClue: Tinya Wazzo.

Actually, just googling on "bgztl" came right up with page-long
essay on what the heck it is.
--
Christopher Mattern

"Which one you figure tracked us?"
"The ugly one, sir."
"...Could you be more specific?"
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

Peter Cooper Jr. wrote:

> kenaustin <kenaustinw@netSPAMMENOTscape.net> writes:
>
>>Hello,
>>I'm attempting to make a custom set of cards, and I would appreciate
>>it if you all would critique the cards for wording, rules, and balance
>>problems. Also, if there is a better format for typing the card up
>>please let me know.
>
>
> The following is completely my opinion. Feel free to take or ignore my
> suggestions; I won't be offended.

The very reason why I posted it here, so please, opine away! :)

>>Bgtzl (rare)
>>Land
>>Phasing
>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out. As long as Bgtzl
>>is in play, target land does not phase in as normal. If Bgtzl leaves
>>play target land phases in. If target land phases in, Bgtzl phases
>>out.
>
>
> That's way too confusing for an average player. If you printed this
> card, it would have tiny text. Having complicated cards can be fine,
> if the complication add something useful to the game. Having this
> phase out and the other card phase in back and forth just seems like a
> lot of complication for very little gain. The only real reason to play
> this card that I can see is to remove one of my opponent's lands
> temporarily, and I'd think that there are better cards out there that
> do that.
>
> The idea of a land that can temporarily remove an opponent's land
> might have some merit, but I'd think that there has to be a simpler
> way.

I was trying to make a land that would be able to lock one of an
opponents lands "phased out". It would phase out a land when being
played from the hand and if it phased in, and if it was made to stay in
play (the 2 mana cost ability), it would then keep the land phased out.
But if for some reason the "target land" was allowed/made to phase back
in, then Bgtzl would immediately phase out. Also, if Bgtzl left play
then the "target land" would immediately phase in.

The long card wording, like the above paragraph, was due to my tendency
to over explain things.

> As for wording, each instance of the word "target" requires a target
> to be chosen. If it can't phase in as normal, I'm not sure why the
> last sentence is there. And phasing it doesn't trigger comes-into-play
> effects. I would word this ability as several abilities, like:
>
> When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
> As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
> When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
> When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.

Exactly what I wanted, with the added ability to keep Bgtzl in play.

> Or, to simplify things, something along the lines of this maybe:
> Phasing
> When Bgtzl comes into play, target land gains Phasing. (This effect
> doesn't end at end of turn.)

Would this work? "When Bgtzl comes into play, target land Phases out and
gains Phasing. (This effect doesn't end at end of turn.)

>>T: Add 1 to your mana pool
>
>
> No problem with that one, although I'm not sure if it's good enough to
> make me want to play this card.

This could be made color specific, although I would lean toward White or
maybe Blue, not the traditional land removal colors of red or black.

>>2: Bgtzl does not phase out this turn. Play only at the beginning of
>>your Untap step.
>
>
> You can't play anything *during* your untap step... I suspect that you
> want something like:
>
> 2: Bgtzl does not phase out next turn. Play this ability only during
> an opponent's end of turn step.

Yeah, this would keep Bgtzl from Phasing out during your Untap step,
and, along with the "As long as Bgtzl is in play" line, will keep the
opponents land Phased out.

> Although that wording won't work so well in multiplayer. You might
> want to get rid of the timing restriction completely.

I think it might work.
Thank you.



--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

Simon Nejmann wrote:

> On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 06:37:53 -0500, pete+mtg@cooperjr.name (Peter
> Cooper Jr.) wrote:
>
>
>>kenaustin <kenaustinw@netSPAMMENOTscape.net> writes:
>
>
>>>Bgtzl (rare)
>>>Land
>>>Phasing
>>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out. As long as Bgtzl
>>>is in play, target land does not phase in as normal. If Bgtzl leaves
>>>play target land phases in. If target land phases in, Bgtzl phases
>>>out.
>
>
>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
>>As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
>>When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
>>When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.
>
>
> I agree that this is a much simpler wording of the original card (and
> has fixed the "target" problem).

Yes, it is and did.

>>Or, to simplify things, something along the lines of this maybe:
>>Phasing
>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land gains Phasing. (This effect
>>doesn't end at end of turn.)
>
>
> But this does not result the same effect. They should alternate being
> in play, but here they are either both in play or both phased out.
> Also, this effect dosn't stop when Bgtzl is destroyed or returned to
> your hand.

I figured the line "When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in." took
care of Bgtzl being destroyed, phased out, and returned to hand. Aren't
they all considered "leaving play"?

> Use Astral Slide and suddently half of the opponents lands has
> phasing.
>
>
>>>T: Add 1 to your mana pool
>>
>>No problem with that one, although I'm not sure if it's good enough to
>>make me want to play this card.
>
>
> Perhaps make it "1 mana of any color"?
> Being that the land is either only usable every second turn or has an
> anti-phasing upkeep of 2, "any color" should not be too much.

Hmmm, I already have an "any color" land in mind for this set, but I had
considered making it one color in the above post. Maybe a dual. What do
you think of White/Blue? Enticing enough?

>>>2: Bgtzl does not phase out this turn. Play only at the beginning of
>>>your Untap step.
>>
>>You can't play anything *during* your untap step... I suspect that you
>>want something like:
>>
>>2: Bgtzl does not phase out next turn. Play this ability only during
>>an opponent's end of turn step.
>>
>>Although that wording won't work so well in multiplayer. You might
>>want to get rid of the timing restriction completely.
>
>
> Yup, why have the restriction at all? Activating it at the very last
> moment is, almost by definition, the best choice - why have this extra
> restriction when that is how it will (should) be played anyway.
> You could also ask, what harm is there in allowing this to be
> activated at any time?
> "2: Bgtzl does not phase out next turn." gets my vote.
>
>
> Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?

That's the name of the planet it's inspired from.
Thanks


--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

David DeLaney wrote:

> Simon Nejmann <snejmann@worldonline.REMOVETHIS.dk> wrote:
>
>>Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?
>
>
> Yes, shouldn't that be "Bgztl"?

You know, I found it both ways. In the "Who's Who" books, both the
original and the Legion specific ones, it's spelled "Bgtzl". In the
regular books and the "Secret Files" it's spelled "Bgztl". So it came
down to me liking the sound of "Be-Get-Zul" better than "Be-Giz-Tul".

> Dave "_yes_, I get bothered by misspellings, why do you ask?" DeLaney
>
> PS: ObClue: Tinya Wazzo.

She's an immaterial girl living in an immaterial world.

--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 01:19:04 GMT, kenaustin
<kenaustinw@netSPAMMENOTscape.net> wrote:

>Simon Nejmann wrote:
>
>> On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 06:37:53 -0500, pete+mtg@cooperjr.name (Peter
>> Cooper Jr.) wrote:

*** Wording 1 ***
>>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
>>>As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
>>>When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
>>>When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.

*** Wording 2 ***
>>>Or, to simplify things, something along the lines of this maybe:
>>>Phasing
>>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land gains Phasing. (This effect
>>>doesn't end at end of turn.)

>> But this does not result the same effect. They should alternate being
>> in play, but here they are either both in play or both phased out.
>> Also, this effect dosn't stop when Bgtzl is destroyed or returned to
>> your hand.
>> Use Astral Slide and suddently half of the opponents lands has
>> phasing.
>
>I figured the line "When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in." took
>care of Bgtzl being destroyed, phased out, and returned to hand. Aren't
>they all considered "leaving play"?

Wording 1 works as intended, but wording 2 has the problems described
above.

>> Perhaps make it "1 mana of any color"?
>> Being that the land is either only usable every second turn or has an
>> anti-phasing upkeep of 2, "any color" should not be too much.
>
>Hmmm, I already have an "any color" land in mind for this set, but I had
>considered making it one color in the above post. Maybe a dual. What do
>you think of White/Blue? Enticing enough?

Perhaps.
If you would rather not make it "any color", then you could try "T:
Add 2 to your mana pool" instead. Hmm, I don't know how well it fits
with its inspiration, to make it able to tap to keep itself in play?

The point is mostly that this land slows the opponent by one land drop
half the time, and the rest of the time it hurts you instead. Thus
that part evens itself out over time, and you have a land here that
does nothing but tap for 1 colorless which is kinda weak (sort of, it
becomes much better if you can take out eg. Tolarian Academy).

>> Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?
>
>That's the name of the planet it's inspired from.

Hmm, ok...
I just googled up that it's a DC comics planet, that explains why I
didn't get the reference :)

--
Regards
Simon Nejmann
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

Simon Nejmann wrote:
> On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 01:19:04 GMT, kenaustin
> <kenaustinw@netSPAMMENOTscape.net> wrote:
>
>
>>Simon Nejmann wrote:
>>
>>
>>>On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 06:37:53 -0500, pete+mtg@cooperjr.name (Peter
>>>Cooper Jr.) wrote:
>
>
> *** Wording 1 ***
>
>>>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
>>>>As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
>>>>When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
>>>>When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.
>
>
> *** Wording 2 ***
>
>>>>Or, to simplify things, something along the lines of this maybe:
>>>>Phasing
>>>>When Bgtzl comes into play, target land gains Phasing. (This effect
>>>>doesn't end at end of turn.)
>
>
>>>But this does not result the same effect. They should alternate being
>>>in play, but here they are either both in play or both phased out.
>>>Also, this effect dosn't stop when Bgtzl is destroyed or returned to
>>>your hand.
>>>Use Astral Slide and suddently half of the opponents lands has
>>>phasing.
>>
>>I figured the line "When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in." took
>>care of Bgtzl being destroyed, phased out, and returned to hand. Aren't
>>they all considered "leaving play"?
>
>
> Wording 1 works as intended, but wording 2 has the problems described
> above.
>
>
>>>Perhaps make it "1 mana of any color"?
>>>Being that the land is either only usable every second turn or has an
>>>anti-phasing upkeep of 2, "any color" should not be too much.
>>
>>Hmmm, I already have an "any color" land in mind for this set, but I had
>>considered making it one color in the above post. Maybe a dual. What do
>>you think of White/Blue? Enticing enough?
>
>
> Perhaps.
> If you would rather not make it "any color", then you could try "T:
> Add 2 to your mana pool" instead. Hmm, I don't know how well it fits
> with its inspiration, to make it able to tap to keep itself in play?

I like this idea, too.

> The point is mostly that this land slows the opponent by one land drop
> half the time, and the rest of the time it hurts you instead. Thus
> that part evens itself out over time, and you have a land here that
> does nothing but tap for 1 colorless which is kinda weak (sort of, it
> becomes much better if you can take out eg. Tolarian Academy).

>>>Ps. Is there a reason it is called Bgtzl?
>>
>>That's the name of the planet it's inspired from.
>
>
> Hmm, ok...
> I just googled up that it's a DC comics planet, that explains why I
> didn't get the reference :)
>


--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

kenaustin wrote:

> Hello,
> I'm attempting to make a custom set of cards, and I would appreciate it
> if you all would critique the cards for wording, rules, and balance
> problems.

Down to 3 versions of the original draft. Which one/s would you like to
play with? Also, I think the 4th text line, "When Bgtzl phases in, that
land phases out.", should be omitted. That way the owner would be able
to target a new land when/if Bgtzl phases back in if they wanted to. Am
I right?

The Card:

Bgtzl (rare)
Land

Phasing

When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
OMIT?-When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.-OMIT?

V.1 T:Add W or U to your mana pool
V.2 T:Add 2 to your mana pool
V.3 T:Add WU to your mana pool

2:Bgtzl does not phase out next turn.

Thanks



--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

On Sat, 25 Dec 2004, kenaustin wrote:

> kenaustin wrote:
>
>> Hello,
>> I'm attempting to make a custom set of cards, and I would appreciate it
>> if you all would critique the cards for wording, rules, and balance
>> problems.
>
> Down to 3 versions of the original draft. Which one/s would you like to play
> with? Also, I think the 4th text line, "When Bgtzl phases in, that land
> phases out.", should be omitted. That way the owner would be able to target a
> new land when/if Bgtzl phases back in if they wanted to. Am I right?

No, phasing in doesn't trigger comes-into-play triggers, so without
that clause it wouldn't do anything special anymore later on.

> The Card:
>
> Bgtzl (rare)
> Land
>
> Phasing
>
> When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
> As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
> When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
> OMIT?-When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.-OMIT?
>

I woudl choose:

> V.2 T:Add 2 to your mana pool
>
> 2:Bgtzl does not phase out next turn.
--
David
 
Archived from groups: rec.games.trading-cards.magic.misc (More info?)

David de Kloet wrote:

> On Sat, 25 Dec 2004, kenaustin wrote:
>
>> kenaustin wrote:
>>
>>> Hello,
>>> I'm attempting to make a custom set of cards, and I would appreciate
>>> it if you all would critique the cards for wording, rules, and
>>> balance problems.
>>
>>
>> Down to 3 versions of the original draft. Which one/s would you like
>> to play with? Also, I think the 4th text line, "When Bgtzl phases in,
>> that land phases out.", should be omitted. That way the owner would be
>> able to target a new land when/if Bgtzl phases back in if they wanted
>> to. Am I right?
>
>
> No, phasing in doesn't trigger comes-into-play triggers, so without
> that clause it wouldn't do anything special anymore later on.

Argh! This was pointed out to me earlier in the thread, I guess it
didn't sink in properly.

>> The Card:
>>
>> Bgtzl (rare)
>> Land
>>
>> Phasing
>>
>> When Bgtzl comes into play, target land phases out.
>> As long as Bgtzl is in play, that land can't phase in.
>> When Bgtzl leaves play, that land phases in.
>> OMIT?-When Bgtzl phases in, that land phases out.-OMIT?

So, for it to do what I want it would need to say "target":
"When Bgtzl phases in, target land phases out"

To cut down on text, could lines 1 and 4 be combined:
"When Bgtzl comes into play or phases in, target land phases out"?


> I woudl choose:
>
>> V.2 T:Add 2 to your mana pool
>>
>> 2:Bgtzl does not phase out next turn.
Thanks

--
"For one brief embarrassing moment, I chose to give up. But your words
were just the reminder I needed. Perhaps insignificant to you, but
sometimes I think we're unaware of how the little things for us can be
so huge for others."


Samir
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

TRENDING THREADS

Latest posts

Moderators online

Share this page

COMPANY
RESOURCES
FOLLOW
Top Bottom