If it boots to the BIOS, then chances are the RAM is handling it.
I found with RAM if it doesn't work, it wont start, just gives three beeps and that's it.
You shouldn't need quite so much voltage on the NB, I do 533Mhz on 1.28V without issue. I ran my Asrock P45 at 1.5V, and it didn't last long I'm affraid.
Something you can try is a little extra VTT, keep it as far under 1.4V as you can though. Have seen lots of accounts of > 1.4 killing processors (mostly quads). I'm doing my o/c with 1.3V VTT.
If you find you are having to use excessive voltage to get to 4Ghz, then I'd go for a higher end board. Fighting too hard with voltage for a daily PC can be a bit of a risky game and often not worth it. That's what happened with my Asrock, so now I limit myself to stay within a certain range.
Should also point out, check out the overclocking core 2 duo and quads sticky thread at the top of the overclocking section. Much more information in there
Also may be more people who can post up with more experience. I'm no overclocking god or anything.