I love you Windows Vista; you Complete Me.
I would like just one week go by where I didn't utter the phrase : "God Dam it Vista you worthless, piece of f%$#ing dog s&#!.
This is my computing experience now days. These people who say they love Vista abound though, saying oh if you were not too cheap to buy good hardware you'd love it to. I have 8 gigs of ram and a quad core , yay I can surf the web check e-mail, great. It's a shame most of Vistas "features" have been around for 5 to 10 years and run better and faster on lesser hardware under other operating systems including XP. There is the "eye candy" of vista that BTW is f%$#ing weak sauce to begin with, and often worse, is nothing but downright fugly nonsense that gets in the way of productivity.
It clearly follows the office 2007 school of design which is - "Oh s&#! we can't think of anything else to do to a f%$#ing $300 word processor and it's expensive and there are free ones out there they are just as good. Dam, I mean it's done. Sure we can glue in some wizards to auto upload to your blog or try and integrate it more with other MS products, but we have to sell it again to make money and it's still just the same f%$#ing word processor. For how many years can we be developing and improving new versions of it ? Well I know! The interface just has to look totally different so people will not start thinking about how they bought this program already like 4 years ago. But how do we make it that different it's already got everything logically organized and easily accessible ? Well let's move s&#! under some new menu (just make up a name for it and s&#!) with a big button and then let's throw in some tabs with huge graphics. I know we can mix some icons and buttons in with the text and options and throw them all on those tabs (maybe we can write setting on scraps of paper and mix them in a f%$#ing hat and bam another menu.) People will be like wow there are so many features I lose 3 inches of screen real-estate and have to tab between multiple interfaces ..this sure is a lot of features" and totally worth the money.
This is what the Vista interface brings, the wow it sure is different factor. Why are things are in places that make no sense logically, even old XP features moved around too ? Not to accommodate a new better workflow or anything I seems but hell they couldn't have them happen to be anywhere similar could they ? People would be like hey this is XP only s&#!ier and slower. Like they did when they upgraded to Windows ME from Windows 98. If that fails put a few layers of PowerPoint like full screen wizards in between the user and his settings then ask him if he's sure he wants' to see the settings 3 times, or in what way he wants to see them, then for some settings advise he must go back and choose another way, then come back, this can add 3 or 4 more menus and maybe he'll just forget about what he was trying to do and Vista won't have to crash.
Where are the other "Features ?" That is if can't call hiding settings, forcing default account permissions features at all. I have yet to see or have anyone mention even one useful new feature Vista brings. Oh and if your using anything but Ultimate your not even geting the usless s&#! they are using as the OS's selling points. BTW shadow Volume copy is not new to vista and running it on a single users desktop/laptop as part of system restore is stupid. So if you don't want it monitoring and making multiple copies of all your files and grinding your disk just turn off system restore and do without.. um the system restore part of ..um system restore. Great. Now maybe this slow as s&#! , bloated, annoying OS could be tolerable if it f%$#ing worked right. Ok it's not giving you anything new of any real value and it's slow and expensive and looks like s&#! with a convoluted interface, but could it at least f%$#ing work ? Apparently not. Every time I hear someone who like Vista talk about it I'm like what is it giving you over XP ? They are like why is everyone complaining about it, it runs fine once you buy high end hardware.
So Advantage 1: It's runs fine as long as you have a fast PC.
Then I'm like ok what else ?
It plays games and has Direct X 10.
So 2 It Plays games (maybe with the performance of XP if you're lucky) and Microsoft is not releasing DX 10 for XP. Oh it's way faster then XP ? Yeah but you added 2 gigs of ram a new video card and processor for Vista remember ?
Anything else ?
Oh it has ready boost. To launch those application you use most frequently faster. (for systems with limited ram anyway)
So 3 If you go out and buy a high speed , high capacity USB thumb drive it will try to cache files there so your PC seems less dog slow because you have no ram left. In theory if it didn't cause system instability half the time and need to be disabled you almost could have some applications launching almost as fast as all applications launched under XP or under another OS where you'd just be using the drive for something silly anyway like storing your data and files instead of the OS using it to limp along.
If one more person tells me it's the most secure Windows OS ever or worst how secure it is in general I am going to punch them in the throat! How is it more secure you ask them , what does that mean ? Do you even f%$#ing know or did you see it in a commercial ? Well they say I try to download viruses all the time and run as an administrator while surfing porn and I never use any anti-spyware apps and I click on anything because I am an a$#hat. Vista is constantly asking me if I am sure I want to do anything and if I am being an a$#hat. Now some people might find this very anoying but like most thrilled vista users I am an a$# hat so this is a great feature. Then it tells me downloading files or connecting to the internet may be dangerous .Whew I forgot since it's been 15 seconds since it last told me, thanks Vista ! I totally thought that I wanted to download that file but actually I don't and only your barrage of never ending promps and nagging has saved me from my own un relenting stupidity ! ( at least for 30 seconds or so) Oh and it's got a s&#!ty anti-spyware app built-in that auto updates and scans my PC um I think anyway I can't really tell, but I did notice less s&#! on my pc on account of my being a dumb f%$#er, so it's totally the most secure OS I've ever used.
Never mind the dozens of open default ports , and services connecting to the internet , tasks doing meaningless s&#!, 24/7 maybe some of those are malware or maybe just one of vista's many hidden poorly documented oddities. If you're on 64-bit at least you know it's not an un Microsoft licensed driver for one of your devices because Vista disables them along with drivers by its competitors and then tells you to suck a d#$%. The important thing is just like that root kit on your PC you can't identify what the hell it is or what it's doing so just shrug and go oh well it's Vista. MS shouldn't have just demoted the people responsible for this travesty they should have kicked them in the groin repeatedly , and tossed them drunk style onto the sidewalk out side.
If I try to get anything productive done in Vista it is often 6 hours of troubleshooting then it will break again and MS will advise to re-install over and over again since they can't seem to fix this steaming pile and every up date adds to it's bloat. 5 GB of space to install a service pack are you f%$#ing kidding me ?
Gee I wish I could print , or scan , or watch or burn a f%$#ing DVD but no it's like getting a free joke of day instead. You never know what will happen but it won't just be a logical error that's for sure it will be something comically stupid that makes you go "WTF are kidding me?"
Put in a Netflix DVD ? Can't play it , have to stop Vista from insisting on formatting it , and then use VLC. Put in a blank DVD or CDR of any brand on the other hand to try to burn files to it ..and instead laugh at how it informs you it's not a blank media disc and to a insert blank disc ..you know like one of those movies from Netflix that it is always trying to burn data to as soon as you pop it in.
Too bad is randomly trashes hundreds of GB of dataand too bad applications and the shell go down more often then Paris Hilton. Often there are no solutions to find for it's random issues. They happen one day and are gone the next , then back again with something new. One week I could not play DVD's, or MP3s, or media files of any type Vista told me I was not authorized to consume protected content. I booted into Linux because I didn't want to deal with the 2 hour fix that worked for 50% of people and had no explanation as to the cause. A week later all was working again and I hadn't even run any updates.
I had a week where I could not read compact discs or DVD's of any type. The solution found on a non MS forum was to find a secrete hidden temp folder , (no not the windows temp folder) and put a file in it ...any file at all , make .txt file drop a .jpg of Paris Hilton blowing some guy or what ever, in there and bingo it works again. (Hey I managed to include two Paris Hilton oral sex jokes in one post, go me)
Microsoft had a very technical, and thorough explanation of this bug and a fix for this odd behavior; "This is caused by the user having disabled the auto run feature on the optical drive. Windows Vista will determine the appropriate (the wrong) actions (bulls&#! prompts for usless crap) for you to choose from baised on the media inserted. Re-enable the auto run feature on the drive (didn't work and I needed it disabled to run my virtual machines anyway) and re-boot. If this dose no solve the issue re-install Windows (Hmm re-install windows because I set auto run to off ? I know how about you go to straight to hell, how about that!)
Ah as much as I enjoy searching forums for reg hacks , and all manner of fixes that take hours on end just to be able to , print , or read a DVD or , play media files or do any number of routine things, I have realized something. I can use Linux and have to do the same things. Linux however is fast , pretty, more reliable, has lots of online resources , boots in 10 seconds, doesn't trash my data , and oh yeah once I get it working as long as I don't f%$# with it (not use it and it breaks, f%$# with it that is intentionally do crazy s&#! to it that I expect may break it), it stays working!
Hmm also most my hardware works out the box with the better more recent distros too. Hardware that doesn't work in Vista (or dose then stops after a week and the fix from the 3rd party manufacturer is reinstall the OS again) , and some of them are brand new Microsoft peripherals too.
So Vista = is hell to get them going and Linux detected and configured them automatically. Linux is easier to use and support's more of my hardware and using Ms brand devices works better in linux ? Has the world gone mad ?
Well if Windows can't even be easier to use and support more hardware then Linux, MS better hold onto that proprietary direct x and windows only application monopoly as windows is more and more just the Tax you pay to use these apps. Hell if I was just using my pc for IM, e-mail and web surfing and was geting an OS pre-loaded on hardware from an OEM with drivers some thing like Ubuntu would be cake no fuss, no bull s&#!, and you couldn't pay me to put Windows on there.
Call it Vista Ultimate, call it Mojavi , call it "OS s&#! Stain Popsicle" call it what it is a $300 kick in the pants. I got my copy free and I still feel ripped off. How about the worst OS since Windows ME. That can be the new slogan.
People tak about how they botched the launch of Vista. Where was the advertising , the rolling stones song and the catchy marketing phrase permeating the Air waves and the internet ? Maybe they figured they don't need to sell it you'll buy it and use it wither you like it or not because you have no choice. or Maybe they didn't bother producing a decent product because they figured you have no choice, and while they couldn't find anything new and worthwhile to add to the next verson of "Windows" figured people wouldn't notice. Then they were f%$#ing ashamed of it as they dam well should be.
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