More details.
Per the no-post sticky, I tried removing just about everything, including the RAM. The MB docs say that it has a power blinking feature such that the LED will blink at a certain rate if no RAM is detected. No RAM is present, and it isn't blinking. So the problem is either the MB, the CPU, or the PSU as there is nothing else left. Ordered a cheap AMD CPU that will hopefully work with MB's BIOS, and a cheap RAM stick just in case the RAM doesn't work (b.c. the ones I have weren't listed on the Foxconn list of "tested" sticks either). I will borrow a speaker from another case to see if I get any beeps, but things are pointing to an unsupported CPU for the BIOS on the MB.
Foxconn support was marginally helpful. They said that the CPU could be the problem too, but did not tell me what BIOS version I had (I asked), nor what CPUs WOULD work with that BIOS version. They also said to get a cheap AM2 / AM2+ CPU, which didn't make a lot of sense to me given the AM3 socket? I would think AM2 wouldn't work.