Another thing to consider that wasn't mentioned here, is that Microsoft recently agreed to buy Bethesda's parent company Zenimax for $7.5 billion. So there's a high likelihood that many game series like the Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Starfield, Doom, Quake, Wolfenstein, Rage, Prey, Dishonored, and The Evil Within, among others, could become Xbox/PC exclusives. Or at least timed exclusives, for any titles that Microsoft decides to eventually open up to Sony's platform to extract more profit from. Some new games that were set to be timed PS5 exclusives like Deathloop and Ghostwire Tokyo will still be exclusive to the PS5 for the first year as previously agreed upon, but it's possible that any potential sequels to those titles may also become Xbox exclusives. I agree that it's still arguably a tie though, dependent on what games one prioritizes, and Sony does have a number of popular exclusive series of their own, along with a better launch lineup.
I wouldn't get too caught up on the numbers of wins in these "versus" articles, as the results usually tend to be a bit questionable. A lot of these categories are more nuanced than the wins and losses would imply, and the categories themselves often seem somewhat arbitrarily chosen. It's probably best to just treat it as an article comparing what each of the consoles has to offer.
Yeah, the upgradability seems like it would be more of a tie. Both pretty much just amount to adding storage at this time, and the details of that are still rather vague in both cases. Microsoft's drives might be in a proprietary format, but that could potentially change if an adapter to use other NVMe drives eventually becomes available. Sony's solution might be a little more open, but it sounds like they will also require drives to meet certain criteria, so you will probably be spending nearly as much as with Microsoft's solution. And of course, the lower capacity of the PS4's drive will likely make upgrading a bit more necessary.
As I understand it, the existing PSVR is only currently supported for backward compatibility of PS4 titles, and requires an adapter for the PS4's camera to connect to the console. VR titles designed to make full use of the new console's hardware will probably not come out until the new PSVR's launch, and it's unknown whether or not they will require the new headset. In any case, the new PSVR hasn't even been announced, so I wouldn't expect it until at least late next year at the earliest.
And of course, Microsoft already has their own Windows Mixed Reality VR hardware ecosystem with much more advanced headsets from various vendors, and they could very well open up VR on their platform to counter the new PSVR. They scrapped plans to do that on the Xbox One, but that doesn't necessarily mean they won't on the new hardware. They stated last year that VR wouldn't be a "focus" of the Series X, but that doesn't necessarily mean it won't be a side feature. It would be quite simple for them to add Windows Mixed Reality support, and the Series X hardware should be capable of running VR titles rather well. So far, neither Sony or Microsoft have officially announced much about VR on their respective platforms, so there isn't really much to say about it, aside from the backward compatibility with the PS4.
Microsoft has also been acquiring studios in recent years that have done a decent amount of VR development. As mentioned above, they are now gaining the studios responsible for some of the larger "AAA" VR ports, like Skyrim VR, Doom VFR, and Fallout 4 VR. And prior studio acquisitions brought them Ninja Theory, who did Hellblade VR, along with other studios who developed VR titles. Official VR support was added to Minecraft too. So, Microsoft has a decent amount of first-party development talent that could potentially be put toward VR on their console.