Unban Fat Hate On Reddit: An Open Letter From The Fat Community Manager Of Tom's Hardware (Opinion)

[jaber2]

Your article JP got my attention, I was interested in your point, then the article kept on going and going and going...,I got tired and decided to read comments, then I kept on reading and reading and reading and I got tired, so I decided to to type my one comments and then kept on writing and kept on writing and ZZZzzzzZZZZzzzz .............................

 

[jpishgar]

Gotta give the writer of this article props for being honest about being a big guy on the internet. This place can be brutal. Too, congrats on the weight loss. Keep going mate

What's the worst that could happen? I get called a name? I gots ban privileges here. Hah!

By allowing hateful people to congregate you slow then to reinforce each other's hurtful opinions, they end up feeling like it's more normal and accepted than it really is.

Containment is a sword that cuts both ways, which is why it must accompany a concerted effort to marginalize and exclude. Allowing the hateful to form micro-communities of their own, and then force them to the fringe of your society, those communities eventually eat themselves alive. Any community based on hate will eventually turn on its own and disintegrate. "We hate fat people", as a for instance. Oh? How fat? There's an entire psychological disorder set stemming from the brain's attempt to quantify "how fat is too fat". A community built to promulgate hate for a certain body type will inevitably eat its own members. There's a danger in allowing them to organize, to codify rules and set a culture personal to their hate-fueled collective, but containment is your only option if, say, you allow communities to form to discuss what they like the most about pictures of dead, mangled children (which Reddit does).

The difference with you is that you decided to take personal responsibility for your health and do something about it. You did not decide to "change" others "perceptions" so that you did not have to change yourself

Personal change is a good thing, a thing to strive for. I am neither proud nor shamed to be a big guy. It is simply who I am. I was born 10 lbs, 9 oz, and quite literally everyone in my entire family is a porkbutt. Growing up in the South, I'd say Coca-Cola actually had a significant amount to do with packing on the extra pounds. It's coke, not coffee, that you wake up with. Extra refill at dinner - yes please. It was culture, personal choice, upbringing. Not entirely of my doing, but also not without responsibility. I didn't learn what a "carb" was until I was in my mid-twenties.

My take on it is, people should be accepting of fat folks for their body types, and fat folks should be receptive to positive, constructive advice on health. Respect, not malice, should be the cornerstone of any interaction. When you drop that, you start to get into the fat hate / fat enablement which are really just two sides of the same coin - a lack of respect for others, and a lack of respect for self.

-JP

 

[BulkZerker]

StarkRG... Lemme tell you about a message board called widardchan. And how it was brought into the spotlight of the SJWs attention (thanks gawker media) and how it cause people to go there and stir up real problems in an attempt to turn the board into complete chaos and force the admin's hand, and subsequently close the board because nothing constructive was being said, just annons flaming each other.

From the ashes rose 8chan.

The rest is history.

Moral of the story? Leave the haters to hate in their corner.

Mark my words this subreddit will be back, and way larger, and way more destructive. That of course implying reddit isn't the wet cow pie of the internet already. (Let's be honest here, the Chan's have had time to dry out in the sun)

 

[ezyweb1]

I'm not so sure.

Like you said, it's not a free speech issue, therefore it becomes a pragmatic and ethical one. I think it's a good thing to shut down hate, not give it space, otherwise you are implicitly condoning it. The fact that not all hate boards were shut down is not completely arbitrary, it has to do with the pragmatics of dealing with the most vocal ones and sending a clear message to the others.

It's like the incorrect theory about "letting out your anger". Research shows that "suppressing" anger *is* better than hitting a pillow, because it trains you to manage your feelings. Giving hate groups space simply encourages them, lets them grow, and after a certain point, you have to decide what kind of society you want to live in.

 

[agentbb007]

I just talk to my friends, my family and worry about what is directly affecting me.

That is a great mentality to have, too many people are caught up with all of these things that have very little influence on their life.

 

[PaulBags]

My take on it is, people should be accepting of fat folks for their body types,

Yip, can't snap your fingers and be thin overnight

and fat folks should be receptive to positive, constructive advice on health.

no, at least not from strangers who don't know you well enough to comment on your health. Doctors, friends, maybe family members get to have a say on their concerns and offer support, help, and advice. But a random stranger commenting on your business is disrespectful.

 

[enforcer84]

From what I've read they banned 5 subreddits. FPH was just the largest.
They were all banned for harassment reasons and according to the the Washington Post they were all warned before.

The five Banned subreddits were:
r/fatpeoplehate
r/HamPlanetHatred
r/Transf**s
r/Neof**
r/S***N*****sSay
(names were changed for posting in Washington Post and I'd figure I'd not use such language here)

Now hundreds of similar themed subreddits still exist. Apparently they do not go into specific harassment and were not banned. The Mass banning that happened when the irate members of the 5 banned subreddits was mostly putting out fires. And there are dozens of subreddits now specifically harassing the CEO or Reddit. Which will most likely get banned.

I don't have much sympathy for the banned subreddits. As you've pointed out there are subreddits for looking at dead people (quite a few, really) so the whole censorship argument is kind of weak. The subreddits had been warned, they didn't play by the rules such that they are, and they were removed. I bet you similar things have happened here.

 

[HyperMatrix]

As someone who at one point weight 243lbs, I had never ever wanted anyone to pretend my fatness was ok. Being reminded that it's a bad thing is just another motivation to get in better shape. That was my view then, and it's my view now at 160lbs. My mom always said to never make fun of things that were out of their control. Fatness isn't out of your control. If you choose to stay fat, why should others give you a free ride? I will body shame for life. This is the absolute minimum of what freedom of speech should allow.

 

[PaulBags]

Yip, because everyone else has exactly the same funding, lack of other health issues, support, advice, etc as you hypermatrix. Sorry no, you're a ****. I'm **** shaming you, since you like shaming take THAT on board *********.

(Moderator edit - Please refrain from personal insults)

 

[HyperMatrix]

Yip, because everyone else has exactly the same funding, lack of other health issues, support, advice, etc as you hypermatrix. Sorry no, you're a ****. I'm **** shaming you, since you like shaming take THAT on board *********.

Difference is I don't care about you voicing your opinion. Also being fat doesn't happen from lack of food. It comes from an excess of food. So just...don't put that next piece cake in your mouth. You'd be surprised how much your eating habits will change when you simply know the nutritional value of what you eat. But if you choose not to pay attention to that, that's another issue. And it's still your issue.

The greater majority of fatties could lose the weight and save money at the same time. But lack of willpower makes them look for excuses as to why they're fat, and why they can't do something about it.

You wanna be a fatty, by all means go ahead. But don't expect me to not mention that you're a fatty.

 

[PaulBags]

That's cool, don't expect me not to call you a **** for it.

 

[HyperMatrix]

That's cool, don't expect me not to call you a **** for it.

I never take offence to what someone with no self control and self respect says.

 

[jpishgar]

On Tom's, unlike on Reddit, civility is compulsory. Please refrain from personal insults.
-JP

 

[turkey3_scratch]

Actually being overweight is more genetic. Back on topic, I don't like Reddit at all. It's a place to complain and whine.

 

[PaulBags]

That's cool, don't expect me not to call you a **** for it.

I never take offence to what someone with no self control and self respect says.

And I don't take the ignorant advice of people who have no respect for others.

 

[Deleted member 217926]

Congratulations on the huge weight loss Joe! I've lost 56 pounds since February myself and although it's not the easiest thing in the world to lose weight ( understatement right? ) you sure do feel better after it comes off. I don't have quite as much to lose as you but I'll be happy if I can lose another 50-70 pounds and keep it off. Keep up the good work!

 

[apcgamer]

Looks like no one congratulated you on your weight loss! That's a great accomplishment! We should celebrate the positive things and not dwell too much on the negative.

 

[RedditRegular]

FPH wasn't contained. They spilled out all over Reddit and you could find them and their crap everywhere. As much as this author claims to have spent time in the hate subs, it doesn't seem like they were a regular user or aware of the kinds of harassment those subs took part in.

Like the time they brigaded /r/suicidewatch and tried to make a user kill themselves.

 

[woodscrews]

I don't know that I agree with your assertion that containing it is good. By allowing hateful people to congregate you slow then to reinforce each other's hurtful opinions, they end up feeling like it's more normal and accepted than it really is.

I do agree, though, that they should start removing the other hateful or otherwise damaging subreddits. Let hateful people go to 4Chan.

its pretty clear from your post that you have either never stepped foot on 4chan or youre too stupid to understand humour.

 

[woodscrews]

I agree with you, but pretending to speak for the entire fat community is wrong.

what community? just because a group of people share a characteristic it does not mean they are a community.

 

[woodscrews]

FPH wasn't contained. They spilled out all over Reddit and you could find them and their crap everywhere. As much as this author claims to have spent time in the hate subs, it doesn't seem like they were a regular user or aware of the kinds of harassment those subs took part in.

Like the time they brigaded /r/suicidewatch and tried to make a user kill themselves.

care to provide some proof of this?

 

[HyperMatrix]

Actually being overweight is more genetic. Back on topic, I don't like Reddit at all. It's a place to complain and whine.

This is absolute nonsense. Fat = stored energy from excess food intake. While "genetics" may result in someone burning a few hundred calories more per day, those same genetics make those people hungrier. Your body wants to find "balance" where you're eating enough for it to maintain itself. This is regardless of your BMR. Every 1 pound of fat is caused by the excess consumption of 3500 calories. Your average person should consume between 1800 to 2300 calories per day based on daily activity, muscle mass, and..."genetics." But that is your range. So to gain 1 pound per week, you'd need to eat 3500 calories in excess of what your body needs for maintenance. 3500 calories is roughly 17 baked skinless chicken drumsticks and 17 baked skinless chicken thighs. Think about how much food that is. 3500 calories is also roughly just 1 large meat lover's pizza. So if you eat just 1 slice of pizza per day, in excess of what you should eat, you will gain about 1 pound of fat per week.

Fat can not come out of thin air. It is directly a result of excess intake. Your metabolism may be slower than others, but so then should your intake of food. Reduce your excess intake, burn off calories through physical activity, and substitute healthier foods like 2 drumsticks and 2 chicken thighs (baked, skinless) or an 8oz lean eye of round or sirloin tip steak (without bbq sauce) instead of just 1 slice of pizza. You'll be full a lot sooner, and on a lot less food.

There is no reason for your fatness but your own failings. There is only 1 medical condition I know that will prevent someone from controlling their weight. A friend of a friend has a condition where their body has extreme difficulty converting stored fat into energy. So they always have to eat at least what their body needs, and also more, because if they don't eat enough they will pass out due to lack of energy (since body can't metabolize stored fat). This leads to a constant state of excess calories. This is a very rare condition. And unless you have it, you have no excuse. Genetics isn't making you fat. Your excuses for your own inaction are.

 

[turkey3_scratch]

Genetics cause that low metabolism, and you are blind because I always see fat people who have fat parents, too.

 

[FinneousPJ]

Genetics cause that low metabolism, and you are blind because I always see fat people who have fat parents, too.

You still have to eat too much to put on weight.

 

[woodscrews]

Genetics cause that low metabolism, and you are blind because I always see fat people who have fat parents, too.

fat parents overfeed their kids